Because I care so much

I care so much. I’m talking about a deep down, funky intense feeling in my bones so much so that I wonder “how will I ever express just how much I care?”.

Why do I care so much?

It’s the love. Not just every day, hug and kiss kind of love. This feeling is an all encompassing boundless sensation FOR ME. I LOVE our world, Earth, the people, animals, all of nature, LOVE IT! I LOVE being alive and having the FREEDOM to feel it all and experience being human, the good, bad, beautiful and the ugly. It’s all so AWESOME isn’t it?

When I sat fasting in the Utah desert for 4 days and nights in the cold of December 2018 I learned about love. That word love is just so limiting though isn’t it?. There is really no word that can encompass this feeling. I prayed, I sat, I day dreamed, I got bored, I yelled, I cried, I laughed, I sang, I wrote, I meditated, I drew images on red rock canyon walls, I got naked, I danced, I howled like a wild animal, I built a sacred fire, I shivered all night, and faced darkness. All throughout the journey there was the Sun. This presence that warmed, comforted and shined it’s light down upon me all day long. It was my best friend. I fell in love with the Sun. I feel deeply in love with mother nature and desert, rock, bird, ancient trees, sky, night, hot, cold all of it. Day after day, night after night, I descended into my wildness. An untamed, fully alive, senses on fire with the slightest stimulation kind of altered state. I poured my love out to the sun and land and the Divine. I have never loved so intensely as that very moment, not even when I birthed my beautiful children or married, or any of the other wonderful moments of human existence. This is LOVE that transcends all and is all things. When I reached the climax of the all encompassing LOVE suddenly the mirror was turned back on myself. I gazed into the sky toward the sun and “heard” a booming voice say “THAT IS HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU”.

WHAT!?

“That is how much I LOVE you”

Stunned and giddy I learned from Sun, and Sky, and the great Mystery what LOVE really is capable of. Limitless, no boundaries kinda feeling. I received and surrendered to the message so completely that every cell and energy particle of “me” now knows what it is to LOVE.

I LOVE Myself, the Earth, the Universe and YOU.

This is why I do this. This is why I care if you shine your light and live your Soul’s true essence and truth into this world. So that you can shine in this emanate love and we can do so together, here, today in our glorious paradise of a world.


Traci Bratton